Honor the Goddess within..

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I started reading Mel Well's first book last week..and I am in awe!

I've been questioning myself about emotional eating lately and this book is full of ah-ha's!

Emotional eating is no joke..and it's so much deeper than ''having no willpower''.  As Mel would say ''You gotta live a fulfilled life.  Otherwise you try to fill the void from the inside out'' (Heard on Lori Harder's Earn Your Happy Podcast, episode 231)

Here's a few passages from the book that really hit home for me (and hopefully for you too):

*What if, despite losing weight, nothing really changed inside the woman's head, when it came to how she FELT about herself?

What if she was still at war with her body, despite it changing physically due to a grueling regime? What if she was still not at peace with what she saw in the mirror, despite celebrating such a "win" with weight loss, and being commended by her trainer and fellow dieters? What if she still agonized every day over her food choices and criticized herself in every photo? Where would that leave her? Is that still a success story?

*A culture fixated on female thinness is not an obsession about female beauty, but an obsession about female obedience. Dieting is the most potent political sedative in women's history; a quietly mad population is a tractable one. - Naomi Wolfe.

*Diet culture has sucked so much joy out of eating that we now use food in ways that was never intended.  We've forgotten that food is essentially there to sustain us, to nourish us, to be enjoyed and loved. We've neglected our RELATIONSHIP with food so much that we just grab things and shove them into our mouths without a second though. We don't even experience food's tastes and textures before it's swallowed and we're on to the next thing.

*If you don't pay attention to the lessons your relationship with food is trying to teach you, they will keep showing up, year and year after year - until you sit up and actually listen. What you resist will persist.

*It's not YOU that keeps failing the diet, OK?

Diets don't work, period.

They are DESIGNED not to work and 95% of women who go on diets and lose weight, gain all the weight back within a year.

The diet is not fundamentally getting to the root cause of your unwanted eating habits or body hating.

* Diets are deigned for you to fail them so that you come back and give it another go.

*Instead of ignoring your cravings, hating them or trying to distract them, I ask you to start embracing them, respecting them and carefully observing them.  When you begin to do this, you will no longer be a slave to cravings. Cravings are here to tell you something. What do you most crave in life? What are you really craving now, if you take food out of the equation?

*Simply stop, slow down your breath and ask yourself "How am I feeling right now?'' That's literally all it is. How am I feeling right now? And then answer with how you are feeling. Define your feeling. And then, instead of using food, sit with the feeling.

Of course, I won't share the whole book with you. I want to keep some of the mystery! LOL

What I want to do now, is share with you my top 5 tips to LOVE YOURSELF.

Click HERE to get a PDF, print it and feel the love:

1- Replace the negative self-talk.

We have A LOT of thoughts going through our mind every single day..and about 80% of them are negative. OUCH!

''Fatso, lazy bum, you're the worst mom EVER, etc'' We wouldn't let ANYONE talk to us this way and yet, we allow AND BELIEVE ourselves when we do so.

This ends now!

It's time to catch yourself before you wreck yourself!

Every time you start saying something mean - PAUSE - and replace it with something nice.

EX: Arrrgh, I failed at my diet ag.... PAUSE.. I will finish and enjoy this cookie and I will move on. I am one strong woman!

2- Give yourself a compliment per day.

Do you wait for someone to tell you that you are kind, pretty , smart, etc?

When you do something totally genius, tell yourself how proud you are!

When you complete a hardcore workout, celebrate your strength!

When you comfort your daughter just in time to avoid a total meltdown, give yourself a pat on the back, mama, you deserve it!

3- Treat yourself. 

Do you wish your partner would buy you flowers regular, or maybe fancy chocolate? Again, why wait - Go Get What You Want!!

Be your own Prince Charming! 

Get the flowers (the ones that you really want)!

Treat yourself to your fave chocolate!

Take yourself out for a coffee!

Buy that cute notebook you've been eyeing!

Stop waiting for someone to treat you like you're good enough...YOU ARE ENOUGH now go out and celebrate YOU!!!

4- Eat & Move like you love yourself.

Of course, there's gotta be something about food & exercise in here! LOL

You have ONE body - take good care of it.

Yes, fries are good...but they make you feel like sh!t, admit it!

Eat food that will give you nutrients, vitamins and ENERGY!

Move your body daily to celebrate it! To say THANK YOU! 

If the gym isn't your thing, good, you get to try new & fun activities until you find what makes your heart happy!

Do it for YOU!

Do it because you love yourself!

5- Say it out loud

Yup, now is the time to say the three little words.  Look at yourself in the mirror and say ''I LOVE YOU!''

Stop waiting for others to say they love you. It feels good, but not as good as when you finally fall ion love with yourself.

Do you feel it.

Do you feel the love?

 Thanks to Wellness Stock Photos for this image.

Thanks to Wellness Stock Photos for this image.

Ready to keep going?

Loving yourself can mean many different things.  It can mean eating better, moving more, making self-care part of your daily routine, time with your family, girl's nights, date nights and so much more.  

Loving yourself also means investing in yourself, believing in yourself and doing everything you can to become a better and healthier YOU.

I want to invite you to keep going and dig a little deeper.

I want to invite you to take the next step.

Believe in yourself.

Believe in your goals.

And get the help you deserve to achieve it all!

Book a FREE 30 minutes call with me so we can figure out what the next step is FOR YOU!!

My 5 best kept secrets to saving your mommy sanity...

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(PSST: Don't feel like reading this? Watch my FB Live instead - CLICK HERE!)

You've seen the articles.  You've read the books. You're doing everything you possibly can to be a cool, calm & centered mama...but something's really bugging you.

None of these people have kids!

Sure, it's all rainbows and unicorns when you HAVE 2 hours every morning to meditate, do yoga, relax in the shower and sip your coffee quietly.  But, that's not your life.  Oh, and we all know that if you start waking up at 5AM to MAKE that extra 2 hours in your day....your kids will start waking up at 4:45!! That's just how that goes!

So, what can a mom do to save herself and her sanity?

Keep reading, as I will share my best kept secrets with you!!

Mama's top 5 secrets to saving your sanity:

  1. Forget the All Or Nothing mindset! Okay, so you might not have an extra 2 hours to do ALL THE THINGS in the morning, but you can take 15 - 30 minutes for YOU!  When I started this journey, I did it all: Meditation, Affirmations, Visualization, Exercise, Reading & Journaling.  It was fun..for a while.  Until it became too much, too overwhelming and was stressing me out.  NOT really the outcome I was going for.  So instead of feeling guilty and like a failure, I decided to shake things up a little and make my morning routine my own! A quick Sun Salutation & 5 minutes meditation on Monday, affirmations on post-its in my bathroom mirror was good enough for Tuesday, visualization & journaling on Wednesday, etc. AND..on days when I decide to sleep in, I take 5 - 10 deep breaths & think of 3 things I grateful for and get up to begin my day! Save your sanity - Find a way to make this work for YOU!
  2. Pick ONE! (and have a backup plan)! This should be 1b)! Make a list of things that make you feel energized, that help you grow, and that make you feel ready to take on the chaos of your mom life. (ex: read a personal development book, watch a documentary, listen to a podcast, look at dreamy pictures on Instagram, do Yoga, take a hot/cold shower, etc) Then, pick ONE to do per day!  Starting your day on the positive side really helps to set the tone for the day, but don't panic if you sleep in and miss a day (or 2).  Reading a personal development in the morning is great, but it also works during 3PM break too! As I mentioned above, I have a schedule (well, a guide..I don't follow it too strictly!) but some days I just don't feel like it.  I grab my coffee and scroll on facebook and I'm totally okay with that...and I know that I've got a Sanity Saver backup plan - PODCAST! (Podcasts are like radio shows..that you actually want to listen to!) My top picks are:
    1. The Amber Lilyestrom Show
    2. The Earn Your Happy Podcast with Lori Harder
    3. Chakra Girl Radio with Amber-Lee Lyons
    4. Sacred Conversations with Rachel Camfield
    5. An excellent example of being human with Tory Dube
  3. Have a Zen Corner! Have a designated spot CLEAN and READY for you at all times.  This is important because when you have 15 minutes to save your soul..you don't want to spend 13 minutes cleaning out your chair! LOL  Zen it up as much or as little as you want, it's YOUR corner.  Add candles, incense, crystals, Buddha statues, nice cushions, a warm blanket, etc. Have fun!!
  4. Get Your Family On Board / Ask For Help! Let your partner and kiddos know that you have decided to take care of YOURSELF and that you need their cooperation.  This is your non-negotiable time..and they will have to wait until your done for their glass of water if they can't make it themselves!  I even make up posters for my kiddos, so they know if I'm having my coffee outside or in the basement.  That way, they can stop yelling my name like crazy people! + Ask your partner for extra support.  Let him/her know that this will only make you more loving and patient! ;) Can't say NO to that!
  5. Catch yourself before you wreck yourself!  It's easy to say ''I've got no time or energy for this!'' and brush it off.  I've even said that a few times myself.  BUT, I am here to tell you that even though it will take a little but of your time and energy, you will reap MAJOR rewards!  A few deep breaths, a few pages of a good book, or a quick podcast episode and WOAH - you will feel calm, cool & centered! You will be ready to take on the day's chaos and be a more loving & patient mama!  A little goes a long way..and when you're ready add a few minutes of me-time to your routine!

Are you ready to give these secrets a try?

Join me on Wednesday evening in The Happy Mama Haven Free Facebook group as I discuss these secrets.  You will be able to catch me LIVE and ask your questions!

See ya there!