I've been dropping hints that I am NO Pinterest Mom all over the place lately and people seem to be thankful that I am saying what they are thinking!
When I got pregnant with baby #2, I started planning my mat leave. 52 weeks of crafts, scrapbooking, sewing projects, decluttering, making homemade meals and so much more. The fact that I already went through maternity leave and had no time to do shit didn't seem to ring a bell.
A rush labour & delivery left me feeling like my hormones were all over the place, but NOT in the right places. I was overwhelmed and exhausted. The idea that I could do better with the second baby in terms of feeding and sleeping schedule seemed like a big fat joke that left me with a bitter after taste.
Still, I woke up every morning convinced that TODAY would be a better day. I had big plans. Crafts, meals, cleaning, laundry, and, of course, bonding with baby. Yet, every day ended with a sense of failure. I scrolled through facebook, watched Bones and ate cold noodles today... nothing worth bragging about.
As I scrolled through facebook daily, I would notice how my mama friends seemed to have it all together. THEY did crafts, THEY started businesses, THEY were happy... and here I was, in my pj's, comparing myself to them and feeling like crap!
I even got to a point where I would google "How to be a good mom"... I won't go further into this! (LOL)
I hit rock bottom. I was crying every night because I felt like a failure, a bad mom, worthless and useless.
Then, one night, I was tired of feeling like shit all the time. I was tired of putting so much pressure on myself. I was tired of trying to be like all the other moms I was jealous of. I was tired of being a shitty mom because I THOUGHT I was a shitty mom. My kids don't care if I don't bake cupcakes every week. My kids don't care if I stay in my pj's all day. My kids don't care if I make sidekicks once in awhile (they actually LOVE IT when I do!). My kids just want my love. PERIOD.
I decided to stop crying and wake up the next morning leaving the big to-do list and crazy plans in the past!
I started slowly, of course. Not caring takes practice!
I asked for help. Took bubble baths. Watched TV all day while cuddling with my baby and appreciated the moment instead of thinking about all the dishes on the counter. Found simple crafts and activities on Pinterest..that I could do WHEN I felt like it.
This simple shift changed my whole life.
I started leaving mom-guilt behind and gained more ENERGY! Actually dropping the insane to-do list gave me enough energy to accomplish what was originally on this to-do list! LOL!
I started looking for balance instead of perfection. Some days, we do crafts and eat homemade meals..and some days, we watch TV in our pj's and eat frozen dinners! And you know what? I AM OKAY WITH IT!
Looking back, I realize that I was setting myself up for failure and disappointment. No one can accomplish so many things in one day..or even a week! What I saw on Facebook and Pinterest was NOT real life, it was someone's highlight reel. I was to caught up in my own struggle to realize that what I was seeing was NOT REAL!
Comparisontitis, jealousy and aiming to be the World's Best Mom had the opposite effect. I was a bad case of shitty mom!
Dropping all the glitter and glam for my pj's, leaving mom-guilt behind and looking for balance in my life lead me to strive to be the World's Okayest Mom..and be OK with it!
Looking to do the same in YOUR life? It can be done! All you have to do is join the Woo Woo Mama Wellness Community!